ONEKIDSMOM   117,431
SparkPoints
100,000 or more SparkPoints
 
 
ONEKIDSMOM's Recent Blog Entries

Triggers, emotional

Saturday, March 05, 2011

In half an hour or so I'll be going in for my monthly maintenance consultation. I've been thinking about what I'm going to say to the first question (and of course any such plans of what to say are pure speculation... they fly out the window as soon as I walk in the door at my center)! Oh? The first question? "How was your month?"

Well, Gina, the day after we last met, I got the phone call about my nephew dying. I have been trying to coax the tears ever since, but I'm still in denial. I've tried sappy movies. I've tried sitting with thoughts of him. Come close, know the emotions are under there... but I've buried them!

Now my dog is struggling. Clearly not herself. Having trouble standing, walking, doing stairs. Not as annoyingly "barky" as she has been. Last night she got herself tangled up in the phone cord in the middle of the night and managed to pull both the phone and the hand vacuum that sits on the same chest onto the floor with a large clatter. She was scared by all of this.

Yesterday I was fragile at work. On the verge of having that dam break and the tears start to flow. But I got busy and didn't make a spectacle at work, although I did confide in a couple of coworkers about the grieving thing.

What's that got to do with weight loss / maintenance, you ask? Food is a comfort... even "naturally" normal sized people will turn to food for comfort in times of stress (especially those of us who eschew alcohol or other "pure" drugs). Those of us with life-long stress - emotional connections to eating? A greater tendency is there.

After decades of living as "me", I know this reality: eating over this stuff does not make it better in the long run. It just transfers what I'm feeling bad about to self-condemnation over being "bad" with food. I have made the conscious decision to stop doing that to myself. I'm worth more than that. My bad feelings like sorrow and anger deserve the respect to be recognized and allowed. I do not need to numb them with food, or if I choose to do so temporarily, I do not need to magnify the problem by continuing to do so!

So, it's been a good month in that even though all these crazy things are going on in my life, I've only had three binge-y days, way over the calorie range. And the statistics show me to be on an average at a slight calorie deficit. The scale SHOULD show maintenance.

Here's to a good weekend. Hope I get some of those tears out.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHRISTURTLE 3/6/2011 8:37PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBRITA01 3/6/2011 9:22AM

    Take care... emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LINDAJOYWK 3/6/2011 7:50AM

    Oh Barb-just wish I could make it all better for you-please know-you are cared about
& being prayed for.-Linda

Report Inappropriate Comment
ANDI571 3/5/2011 9:31PM

    Just big hugs coming your way..... emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
CHRYS13 3/5/2011 6:11PM

    I'll be thinking of you, my friend!
Losing those we love is beyond difficult....you will grieve at your own pace.
Thinking of your precious pet, also.
Take care! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
BUGGYS 3/5/2011 2:43PM

    I am praying for you, Barb and can relate on so many levels...although both my parent have been gone for about 10 years, I am STILL grieving and, I just lost my beloved dog last week, had the flu this week and am slowly getting back to me. I have learned to get in some exercise because it really does relieve some of the stress associated with the grief process. We have all been through similar ups and downs and I am guessing that we have all been emotionally tied to food as well...learning to break the cycle is a hard one but I think you have done so well at achieving your goals and sticking to them!!! I'll be thinking of you and hoping that you can heal and get back to you!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LEANJEAN6 3/5/2011 2:00PM

    Oh Barb, it must be hard--- your dog--your work--your friends---and we do turn to food---Think of how far you have come I guess---Go for a run----- I'll send hugs along ---- nit much consultation ----- You are kinda my idol though on here ----I wish you love, and joy---but--hey---just think, youy AREN"T pregnant!--LOL

Report Inappropriate Comment
BRADOS 3/5/2011 12:30PM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUNNY1432 3/5/2011 10:46AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DAISY443 3/5/2011 10:17AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
FITFABJENN 3/5/2011 10:09AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 3/5/2011 10:10:03 AM

Report Inappropriate Comment
KASEYCOFF 3/5/2011 9:17AM

    You know you're in my thoughts and prayers, hon. It's a vulnerable time at best, after someone close has died, and it can magnify other things (recognizing the potential health problems you're facing with a beloved pet, for example). You're doing well to realize that you still have grieving to do, with or without tears - and moreover to realize that food won't ease the struggle.
No answers and no advice, Barb. Just a warm hug and sympathy.
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MSLZZY 3/5/2011 9:07AM

    You are dealing with life with other things beside food for comfort. That's a plus! HUGS!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUNNY332 3/5/2011 9:05AM

    Some times it is difficult to let go and just have a good cry. Hang in there and know I am thinking about you and praying that "dam" breaks soon.

Huggers, Sunny

Report Inappropriate Comment
PENNYAN45 3/5/2011 8:52AM

    I hope this is a cathartic weekend for you - in terms of grieving - so you can feel the healing begin.

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LOVE_2_LAUGH 3/5/2011 8:52AM

    My sympathies to you Barb. I can relate to what you're going through. I still really haven't grieved for my Mom. I never thought of it as being in denial -- I've been thinking I'm just a horrible, horrible person. I hope your consultation went well. Everything you spoke to in this blog has touched me -- thank you for putting these things into perspective for me so clearly and concisely. Take care and God bless!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SHARON2014 3/5/2011 8:50AM

    Praying for the healing that you need. I've been there too, still am most of the time! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
REJ7777 3/5/2011 8:34AM

    I pray that God grants you those healing tears. emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
46SHADOW 3/5/2011 8:33AM

    emoticonway to go on dealing with difficult emotions ina healthier way. way to go for making it to maintenance.

Report Inappropriate Comment


Are you what you read?

Thursday, March 03, 2011

"Mann ist was man isst." OK, I don't have a German keyboard, and Spark doesn't let me type HTML, but this is an approximation the original of "One is what one eats" or "You are what you eat." We quote it a lot, in a joking sort of a way. Eat healthy, be healthy.

Mentally, are we what we read? Well, reading encouraging Spark posts, success stories, motivational things tends to make me feel more motivated, for sure.

Lately, I've been dipping into the literature of the psychology of weight loss and gain. Currently it's "Angry Fat Girls". Like its predecessor, "Passing for Thin" (same author, Frances Kuffel), it is disturbingly familiar and disturbingly alien at the same time. Since I have inhabited "the rooms" I know the language. But some things about the author's experience never seemed to apply to my own. This doesn't make either of our journeys less valid.

I keep reading, because it is valuable to keep memories green in order to maintain healthy habits. However, the difference between the retrospective this gives and Spark seems to me like the difference between Freudian psychology, seeking to understand "why", and behaviorism that seeks to change "what". You need elements of both in recovery: why helps you past the self-condemnation, but you need to actively change the what. On the other hand, changing the what without understanding the why can lead to relapse and giving up!

I think after this book, though, I'll take a break from this genre for a while, get myself back to the fiction I so enjoy! Here's to a healthy rest of the week folks.

emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUNNY1432 3/3/2011 10:38PM

    Love to read too, just don't seem to find the time. Hope you find something more interesting fiction soon! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MSLZZY 3/3/2011 10:28PM

    Read something a little "lighter" next-to match your awesome progress!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBRITA01 3/3/2011 5:55PM

    Wow, deep thoughts...I like mostly fiction and I don't read as much as I would like. I hope to be more consistent and diverse now that I have my new Kindle.

Report Inappropriate Comment
ROCKLAND2010 3/3/2011 3:20PM

    Deep thoughts for today...I like all sorts of books, mystery, paranormal, novels. It's very relaxing for me. Unfortunately I don't always make the time.

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
REJ7777 3/3/2011 1:27PM

    I love to read and listen to CD's. I find that reading other people's thoughts and perceptions expands my own point of view. Sometimes an author will make me see something in a way I never saw it before. Other times, he/she will put words to a *feeling* I couldn't express.

I tend to read mostly self-help or inspirational books. I like to learn something from what I read.

Report Inappropriate Comment
AEHEGE 3/3/2011 11:58AM

    Reading is one way to keep the mind active, and I find that now in my older years, I mostly read for the pleasure of reading and select books that I want to read, and I like most genres. My 'candy for the mind' books would be mysteries. However, I am now reading Cutting for Stone, which is excellent, and before that I read Water for Elephants, also very good. I never read pure romance novels, but don't see how they could contribute to Alzheimer's more than not reading at all.

Report Inappropriate Comment
GRYPHONQUEST 3/3/2011 8:45AM

    I read all sorts of things. I love romance novels when I'm stressed - knowing there's going to be a happily ever after at the end is nice. I like mysteries, action, S/F, fantasy, histories, biographies... pretty much anything. When I was first starting SparkPeople (oh so long ago - seven weeks now?), there were days I just didn't have the energy to read, and it felt *so* strange!

This week, I'm reading a new-to-me David & Leigh Eddings series ("The Dreamers"), The Happiness Project, Lindsey Sands' "The Heiress"... and probably yet another by tomorrow.

If we are what we read... I guess I'm a book! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUNNY332 3/3/2011 8:24AM

    I read every day and usually fiction. My latest read which was so good and I highly recommend it was - The Hidden Garden by Kate Morton. It was full of mysteries and just when you thought the author was going to answer some questions, she introduced another mystery. It was so good, I ran over to Amazon and ordered another book by her.

Take care and happy reading...

Sunny

Report Inappropriate Comment
YBARRALD 3/3/2011 7:54AM

    My mother has told me for years that she thinks that the drivel romance novels my grandmother read did not feed her brain and may have contributed to the Alzheimers at the end of her life. I wonder if my mother may be on to something there. The experts have been saying more recently that people need to do things that keep their minds active, and that not even things like Sudoku and crossword puzzles do that once you get the knack of it because they're too repetitive. Should we be reading things that are thought provoking? Should we read things across multiple genres? That's what I tend to end up with. Sometimes one genre will dominate another and I know I tend to lean more toward fiction than non-fiction, but overall, I feel the mix is thought provoking. Consider checking out a site called Shelfari (www.shelfari.com) It's a great tool for tracking what you read, what you've read, what you want to read, what books you own, what books you want to own, and a neat place to interact with people who've read the same books or share the same genre interests. Look me up. I'm called Laetificant Lori. emoticon

Comment edited on: 3/3/2011 7:55:16 AM

Report Inappropriate Comment
DAISY443 3/3/2011 7:43AM

    My favorites are murder mysteries! I hope I am not what I read! lol emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


Gotta love those endorphins

Tuesday, March 01, 2011

Yesterday was an "off" day from the half-marathon training. I did a total body strength workout from Spark, instead. Felt good keeping that commitment. Why? Because I love that muscle definition in the progress photos & don't want to lose it! I can't believe it, but there's this little shred of vanity going.

Today, the schedule called for 3-4 "long hills", and the notes indicate the total mileage including warm up and cool down and those hills should be about 4 miles. So, again, tossed something on the TV to keep the mind going while the body moved. This time it was "The Closer". An hour later, 4 faux hills (incline 8) of 3/4, 3/4, 3/4, and 1/2 mile each... with 1/4 mile lesser inclines in between.

And the endorphins start to flow, leaving a feeling of well-being. A good stretch session after, and I know I'll sleep well tonight. Less than nine weeks to that half marathon!

emoticon emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CONCHA77 3/2/2011 7:38PM

    I did notice that muscle definition happening on your photos. Proud to have you on our team-You are a inspiration. emoticon



Report Inappropriate Comment
REJ7777 3/2/2011 1:49PM

    emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBRITA01 3/2/2011 1:42PM

    Vanity? Nah, just pride in the results from all of your hard work and dedication. You've earned it, so enjoy it! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ANDI571 3/2/2011 1:15PM

    I think my endorphins died.... emoticon

You keep that vanity tied right around your neck. You deserve it with all of your hard work.

Comment edited on: 3/2/2011 1:16:12 PM

Report Inappropriate Comment
PENNYAN45 3/2/2011 10:44AM

    Way to GO!!!

Endorphins are the best!

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MSLZZY 3/2/2011 10:43AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUNNY332 3/2/2011 9:04AM

    You totally amaze me. Hope you and the endorphines have a "blast" today.

Hugs, Sunny

Report Inappropriate Comment
LEANJEAN6 3/2/2011 7:55AM

    Good for you girl!!! You are always training and it pays off in your Sparking---- Happy for you!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BUGGYS 3/2/2011 7:42AM

    You should be so proud of yourself!!! Exercise always makes me feel better...it's just getting up and doing it is sometimes a problem for me...the only time I have to do it is early AM and it's between staying in bed or getting up...I am getting better and love how I feel afterwards!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DAISY443 3/2/2011 4:56AM

    Nothing wrong with a little vanity! Keeps us enjoying looking in the mirror! Great work with the exercise!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LJCANNON 3/2/2011 12:43AM

    emoticon emoticonCan you hear the Turtles cheering for you?!
emoticonI heard NO Vanity in this Blog. I did hear Pride in a Job Well Done, and you EARNED that, Sister!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LOVE_2_LAUGH 3/2/2011 12:24AM

    I don't know that it's a case of vanity but perhaps just plain pride. Either way, I'm glad you're feeling so good about it. It's wonderful to hear your good news. I'm really struggling right now with even starting to think about getting back on track with eating better and exercising. I know I should, but I just don't want to. You know -- "poor, poor, pitiful me" syndrome. The good thing (thanks for the reminder) is that I do remember how good it feels once I start eating better and moving more. I'll have to focus on that and see if I can get things turned around. Sooner rather than later.

Report Inappropriate Comment


Geeks can pick ANY topic to be geeky over

Monday, February 28, 2011

You can take me away from my computers and such, you can make me more active, and feed me nutritious foods. But I'll always be a geek at heart. Numbers fascinate me.

Yesterday, I had a 6 mile walk planned, part of my training for the half marathon May 1st. I was doing it on the treadmill, the weather being what the weather is. I had my old episodes of Murder, She Wrote keyed up to keep me company (as opposed to MP3 tunes or basketball on TV, my other considered options). And I thought in terms of time, as I'm starting to do more and more. I have been doing about 90 minutes on my "long" walks, which at 4 miles and hour would be the requisite six miles. But since I crank the speed up a shade above that 4 mph, I usually finish the six and have time for a brief cool down in that 90.

The geek brain: My treadmill clock only has two digits in its "minutes". What would it do if I just added ten minutes to my workout? Would it switch to Hours:Minutes? Or would it reset to 00:00 and, most important, would I lose my miles and other statistics when it did?

I kept going to the 100 minute mark and found that it does reset to 00:00, but I don't lose my other statistics. It then becomes my job to remember the extra hundred minutes. Should not be a problem... nobody forgets having been on there for 100 minutes! emoticon And... the mileage for the day turned into seven miles, instead of the planned six, including the warm up and cool down parts. That's more than halfway to the half marathon distance.

Another goofy statistic that intrigued me this weekend was something I saw in "Angry Fat Girls" by Frances Kuffel. She quotes Pam Peeke, the author of "Body for Life", as saying "For every twenty-five pounds removed, it takes one year to mentally adjust. So be kind to yourself, okay?" Not having looked up the source, can't say that's an exact quote, but it jumped off the page at me. No WONDER I feel a little alien... I'm still adjusting.

Based on that statistic, I have a couple of years of adjustment yet to go to really feel this me (with my "tiny little body" to quote one consultant) is the genuine article. My Spark Friends, if you, like I, have lost or are in the process of losing a considerable sum of pounds... be kind to yourself while you adjust to it. And, if you have NOT lost as much, or have re-gained, give yourself a break.

Everyone, be kind to yourselves. Because we're worth it! The dignity of humanity rules, Geek or Not.

emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSLZZY 3/2/2011 10:44AM

    Great advice! We geeks have to stick together! HUGS!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LJCANNON 2/28/2011 11:54PM

    emoticonSo, in about 7 years this new Body should feel and look Natural?
emoticonIt looks like I'm gonna be here awhile!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BUGGYS 2/28/2011 2:49PM

    Great quote...I'm still thinking about that one!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBRITA01 2/28/2011 2:16PM

    I'm sure it takes time to adjust and settle in with a major weight loss. You seem to be adjusting well. Whoa, 100 minutes on the treadmill?! I'm ready to jump off after 45...impressive!

You're right, geek or not, we deserve to be kind to and accepting of ourselves...

Report Inappropriate Comment
REJ7777 2/28/2011 1:11PM

    Another "Murder She Wrote" fan! emoticon I love how Angela Lansbury plays the role of Jessica with such dignity. She's kind but clever, courageous and smart as a whip!

Well, that geeky brain of yours seems to be helping you to get those miles in and train for that half-marathon. emoticon

"For every twenty-five pounds removed, it takes one year to mentally adjust. So be kind to yourself, okay?" That's a very interesting quote. I'll have to think about it.

Report Inappropriate Comment
TURTLETALK 2/28/2011 11:11AM

    Geeks rule!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LOVE_2_LAUGH 2/28/2011 11:05AM

    "For every twenty-five pounds removed, it takes one year to mentally adjust."

WOW -- I really needed to read this today. Not only the adjustment comment, but the whole "be kind to yourself" message.

Your blog is the first one I've read since being gone for a month. And you didn't disappoint me one bit! Thanks, Barb -- it's so good to be home and among fellow SparkFriends!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MT-MOONCHASER 2/28/2011 10:36AM

    I like the message that it takes time to adjust to the 'new you'.

I think that all the people who are rushing into surgery for the 'skin thing' should also take this into consideration.

Have a good week.

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUNNY332 2/28/2011 9:23AM

    I must be a geek. You know it takes one to know one! Have a Marvie Monday.

Sunny

Report Inappropriate Comment
DAISY443 2/28/2011 8:21AM

    I am a true geek! When I walk on my step machine I mentally decide that I am 1/6 th of the way to goal, then 1/3, etc. etc. Comes of having been a bookkeeper for way too many years. When I go to the eye doctor, I memorize the letters and they have to change the charts. At least, I admit to it!

Report Inappropriate Comment
HOT4FITNESS 2/28/2011 7:57AM

    And us geeks are going to finish this half strong!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BEEBEE1936 2/28/2011 7:42AM

    well, I must not be a "geek".

Report Inappropriate Comment


Vitamin D and progress photos

Sunday, February 27, 2011

By the time I got to the end of yesterday's blog, I went and looked: it had been 3 weeks since I'd taken my most recent vitamin D "booster" pill (the big dosage my Dr. put me on)... so I took one. And I got through the day, without resorting to overeating. It also helped to see the messages of support from my Spark friends, who never fail to encourage when a whine comes out. We all know there will be days like that! The trick is to live through them and do as little damage as possible, because the next day is bound to be better for it.

That said, it IS the end of the month, and that means progress photos. Once again, I've tried to match the pose from last year's photo. I even dug out the same sports bra, but the old sweat pants I was wearing then? No way they would stay on my hips today.

Last year, this was me, at the end of February:


And me, this morning, trying to mug the same shot:


I know I said last month I wasn't going to show you the loose skin, but, well, there 'tis. It's not too terrible... but I'm not going to wear this outfit in public, either.

Here's to today being a better day than yesterday, mood-wise. On the agenda: 6 miles on that half-marathon training schedule.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHRISTURTLE 3/1/2011 11:27PM

    emoticonLook at that muscle definition! You are looking incredible! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MSLZZY 2/27/2011 9:29PM

    Wow! What a difference a year makes! Keep on taking that Vitamin D!

Report Inappropriate Comment
KALIGIRL 2/27/2011 8:46PM

    Loose skin, my eye - you look fabulous!
Hope the vitamin D is working.

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUNNY332 2/27/2011 7:52PM

    Believe me Barb, if I ever get my abs to look like yours, I am headed to Nebraska to borrow that outfit.

Woohoo - you look amazing.

Sunny

Report Inappropriate Comment
TEACHINMOM 2/27/2011 2:14PM

    emoticon Lookin' AMAZING!! WTG!


Report Inappropriate Comment
MNTWINSGAL 2/27/2011 1:01PM

    Woo Hoo.....check out those abs! You Go, Girl!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JOANOFSPARK 2/27/2011 12:25PM

    When I looked at the two photos.......all I could think was Wow!!! you are looking awesome and you can definitely tell you are way more toned and your muscle definition is really showing. Way to go!! Good for you..:)

Gotta ask....how much does your doctor have you on.....?? I just got a new bottle of DG women's multivitamin and mineral and it shows that it has 250% of what is needed for Vit. D.....now the Sparks tracker is showing me over ......way over in Vitamin D.......



again...... emoticon emoticonyou are lookin good..:)

Report Inappropriate Comment
BUGGYS 2/27/2011 10:16AM

    You look great and you can see your muscles and how toned your body really is! emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LJCANNON 2/27/2011 9:46AM

    emoticonYou are looking AWESOME!! And talk about a Six-Pack!?! You've got it going ON, Girlfriend!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DAISY443 2/27/2011 8:58AM

    Lookin' good, girl! Great job!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBRITA01 2/27/2011 8:48AM

    Both photos look great but you can really see more muscle definition in the recent photo. Glad you are feeling better today! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ROCKLAND2010 2/27/2011 8:24AM

    Awesome....keep up the good work. You have made such amazing progress. Thanks for inspiring us.

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
CONCHA77 2/27/2011 8:21AM

    Great Barb. You look great and I can see by your smile you FEEL great.
You earned it.
Have a great workout. Connie

Report Inappropriate Comment
REJ7777 2/27/2011 8:19AM

    I'm glad the sunshine vitamine is doing you good! I think a lot of us are counting the days until Spring.

emoticon You looked pretty good in last year's photo too, but you've made a lot of improvement in your muscle definition in just one year. emoticon emoticon

Keep up the good work! emoticon

Comment edited on: 2/27/2011 8:20:03 AM

Report Inappropriate Comment
HOT4FITNESS 2/27/2011 8:15AM

    I must say you are looking quite good my Sparkfriend. Have a good run. I am guessing you are doing it on the treadmill, unless you are venturing out in the snow. I hear next week spring like weather again.

Report Inappropriate Comment


First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 Last Page