ONEKIDSMOM   133,986
100,000-149,999 SparkPoints
ONEKIDSMOM's Recent Blog Entries

Reprise: As good as it gets

Monday, March 14, 2011

I had a bad weekend with food. I had been holding it together pretty well for a while... but it really was a sheer effort of will. Time change, injury, change in routine, and cleaning on top of it all. You know I'm stressing when I start cleaning and organizing.

I believe that partly the news stories coming out of Japan triggered the stress cleaning. Not that it isn't "that time of year", too... but seeing that level of destruction, the stray thought occurred: what if something like that happened here? How would I feel about what would be exposed if someone had to come into my home following a disaster?

It started me thinking, this cleaning and organizing effort: it's not that different from my eating patterns. I binge eat. Less often than I used to. Granted, or rather self-justified. But... looking at how I'm going through this archeological dig of the piles of papers... I binge clean, too.

As I was going through this process yesterday, I recalled how when I last cleaned my desk at work, I felt at loose ends without my comforting piles of papers denoting projects in process. And I started to get anxious about how I would feel when my house was truly "in order". Would I feel lost? Without identity?

I have been working on affirmations related to household order for a while: "I am a person of dignity, I deserve to live in an orderly home." I visited FlyLady and polished my sink several months ago. But that initial effort has frayed around the edges. Maybe even in the middle, too.

Is this similar to the reaction "fear of success" related to weight loss? The "what do you do with it now that you've got it?" I think for me, it partly is. As with the weight and recognizing that there are going to be days that I will need to recover from... so with the orderliness - I need to learn to cut myself a break and find balance.

The journey to "as good as it gets" continues!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSLZZY 3/14/2011 10:49PM

    Amazing insight! We must be sisters!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUNNY332 3/14/2011 4:27PM

    I would like to get to a point where I have" organized chaos". Not! I am trying for balance which seems to be an ongoing job in progress for me. Hang in there and hope we both find some balance.

I do know what you mean about something like this triggering the desire to get one's life/personal papers in order. I often think, if we had a "tornado", wonder where my bills would end up? Crazy, don't you think?


Report Inappropriate Comment
KALIGIRL 3/14/2011 1:50PM

    Interesting analogy.
I don't deal well with clutter and my desk @ work is just about as bad as I can stand. (Will tackle after sparking over lunch.)
I wonder if your 'piles' are really decisions unmade, or if they're symbols of parts of your life.
If they're symbols and the clutter annoys you, perhaps some filing tools would help?
There are darling colors and types @ Office Depot - a treat for the organizer?

Report Inappropriate Comment
JHADZHIA 3/14/2011 12:44PM

    I have trouble with stacks of paper too. I have to use my bedroom as an office which leaves very little 'me' space left over, so all my business stuff stacks up and when I start having trouble finding things I need then my computer desk goes from not being able to see the glass under it to actually having space to put things on. Some of it is procrastination as I usually have lots of time to get things done. I always eat healthy meals, but lately I have been binge snacking on bad things. Part of the stressers for me is not recovering as fast as I expected, and not being as mentally fit as I once was. I notice a big difference when trying to remember things and trying to play bridge..If I ever am able to solve the insomnia problem, I am sure that would go a long way to help with this..
I may be on maintenance, but I still have a lot work to do as well. You are not in it alone..

Report Inappropriate Comment
FITFABJENN 3/14/2011 12:35PM

    Yes, "what happens next" is a somewhat scary question. I've actually lost a significant amount of weight twice before in my life, but both times the sigh of relief of achieving my goal was quickly followed by a slip back into old habits, and subsequent weight gain.

I think having a supportive Spark community might just be the difference between then and now, though. Even DH said that I seem so much different this time. Perhaps what happens next is that we embrace an active, healthy lifestyle that allows us to take on new challenges we could not do before. That's a future I can get behind.

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBRITA01 3/14/2011 11:06AM

    It's interesting how those impulsive traits carry over into other areas of our lives...not just the eating. Good luck getting things in order...and maintaining (that is always the hardest for me).

Report Inappropriate Comment
LOVE_2_LAUGH 3/14/2011 9:32AM

    The last paragraph spoke to me. It's the "what happens next" part that always scares me. Because almost always, it's maintenance. Whether it be related to weight loss, a clean desk/house, or whatever. Getting there is the interesting and sometimes challenging part. Staying there? Well, that's where the real challenge comes in for me.

Good job on getting your house in order.

Report Inappropriate Comment
DRB13_1 3/14/2011 8:58AM

    keep making progress! emoticon Weight and the condition of our homes are definitely related. My professional organizer makes an important point: Clutter is the result of postponed decisions.
Remember the "handle ezch piece of paper once" mantra. Keep a trash can handy, and if you aren't using it or don't love it - toss it. Open mail over the trash can - dump all the junk so it doesn't have a chance to make it to "a pile."
To encourage you - (for me, at least) having some clean, cleared space is calming and sparks creativity. I hear you when you say clearing your desk produces anxiety, but look at it a different way - instead of "projects in progress" have that "inbox - outbox" system to show how much you have COMPLETED. Think of it as only getting paid once it is done. Maybe that will be motivating.
Whenever what we are doing is not working for us, time to make changes.
"It's not the strong or intelligent that survive, but the most adaptable." -Charles Darwin
emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DAISY443 3/14/2011 8:17AM

    I also binge clean. I think you may be on to something. This is a fight against being a perfectionist and being impelled to clean incessantly! Not going to happen to me again! Been there, done that! As long as it is clutter and not germy, I can deal. Good luck with your search for balance!

Report Inappropriate Comment
REJ7777 3/14/2011 8:00AM

    I can relate. We've got so much in common in our struggles. Perfectionism among other things. I wonder if getting closer to goal is part of what's been causing my binging these last few days. I've gained 12 lbs. There's something going on, but I'm not sure what it is. I'm losing my focus. It's scary. I have to find balance too.

Report Inappropriate Comment
HOT4FITNESS 3/14/2011 7:57AM

    Today is a new day in your journey, so you can move forward--in a clean house!! Woohoo!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment

Procrastination, clutter, decision making, and identity

Sunday, March 13, 2011

My brother refers to the piles of clutter that begin building up almost at once after a thorough cleaning and organizing effort as "decisions not made". My home is full of such piles of "decisions not made". I'll go through the mail, not be ready to immediately reject something, or have the energy to "deal with it", and it goes into a pile. Or I'll pay bills, write the pertinent payment details on them, and needing to them in case of dispute... into another pile they go. And so on.

Oh, I've read the material about how to be organized: only handle each piece of paper once. File in time-boxed periods.

But knowing what to do and doing it are two different things. I don't particularly enjoy this kind of thing. My desk at work is only kept in half-way order about three or four times a year, in those slow bits between development cycles.

Periodically I make a big push at "The Paper Chase". Usually around this time of year. Yesterday I was dragging my feet about starting it. Today I'm working at it. Building consistency is something I need to work at in this area.

One day at a time, in this as in with other things, right? Don't try to take on the world all at once. But don't avoid it, either.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BRENDA1995 3/14/2011 1:13PM

    Decisions not made, that is so true! Thank you for that point of view. I think it will help me with some of my clutter.

Report Inappropriate Comment
REJ7777 3/13/2011 10:09PM

    I can sure relate to the challenge. Clutter is, and has always been, a big problem for me. emoticon

Congratulations on "working on it". emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LEANJEAN6 3/13/2011 5:51PM

    Paper work is awful---and its getting worse! ----But you are sorting it----- Life is full of paper work----- Lynda

Report Inappropriate Comment
KALIGIRL 3/13/2011 3:43PM

    Love the "decisions not made;
My new year's resolution (for the last 5 years) has been to deal with mail as it comes in. Work (and home life) has been hectic until this weekend and I took Saturday morning as an opportunity to 'find' my piles.
(I was one of those kids who put her clothes under the bed instead of in the hamper - out of did the same before the family arrived for Christmas)
It was a little sad to see the opportunities I missed, but rewarding to write my Christmas thank-yous, respond to wedding invitations, and send checks for retreats and my girlfriend's reunion.
Moving my desk and favorite notecards to the (remodeled) kitchen is working (for me). Love being in the heart of the house.

Hope you find what works for you to make those decisions.
Namaste my friend.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MNTWINSGAL 3/13/2011 2:57PM

    I'm extremely organized at work, and by the way my desk looks there one would assume my house was neat as a pin. Not so much though.....even though I have filing systems in place, the paper mess has taken over my writing desk, my computer desk, and my kitchen counter. A couple of months ago when I learned I was having company with only minutes to spare, I grabbed a box and put a ton of paper in there. Yep, still there....waiting for me to go through it.

Report Inappropriate Comment
DAISY443 3/13/2011 2:20PM

    A clean desk is the sign of a messy mind! That's my tenet and I'm skickin' to it! But, good luck with your endeavors!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MSLZZY 3/13/2011 2:14PM

    Excellent advice-sounds a lot like me!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBRITA01 3/13/2011 1:43PM

    Did I write this blog? LOL This is SO me! "Decisions not made"...I like that...and, you have a wise brother. Another good post, Barb...

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUNNY332 3/13/2011 1:18PM

    "decisions not made". Wow - I can identify with this one.

Thanks for a great post.


Report Inappropriate Comment
JANRTEACH 3/13/2011 12:42PM

    I'm with you!!! Thanks for the reminder.

Report Inappropriate Comment

And the car is back in my garage

Saturday, March 12, 2011

I played with the toys on the way back to get the car. By walking through parks and on the bike trails, I shaved the distance to 5.7 miles, which I covered in 93:35 (subtracting two potty breaks). I have better stats this morning because I used my Christmas present (a GPS) to track distance... across parking lots and parks and all, in pedestrian mode. Like I said, I played with the toys.

The other toy was my MP3 player. The tunes from an ABBA album got me all the way to the high school, and Andre Rieu got me the rest of the way to work.

In the frigid morning (it was about freezing), I noticed others out on the trails. I walked beside a golf course, through two neighborhood parks, past the swimming pool, the Children's Zoo, the community rose garden, through the sunken gardens, past the Basketball Tournament busses parked at a high school, and on to the downtown garage where I park.

Walking helps me fall in love with my local community all over again. Those out taking their air and exercise have smiles for one another and a "good morning". And of course, the endorphins of being in motion myself don't hurt the process a bit.

The car was sitting there waiting for me, and I brought it on home. Hope everyone else has a great Saturday, too.


  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DAISY443 3/13/2011 5:39AM

    I enjoy your walks as though I am with you. Please keep on sharing!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUNNY1432 3/12/2011 9:59PM

    sounds like a wonderful morning walk!! emoticon I'm hoping for sunshine for you tomorrow. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MSLZZY 3/12/2011 7:48PM

    Nice to know the weather seems to be moderating for now! HUGS!

Report Inappropriate Comment
TURTLETALK 3/12/2011 2:13PM

    What a lovely start to the weekend!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MOMOF2TONI 3/12/2011 1:06PM

    I love ABBA! The walk sounds so nice. Wishing you a great weekend.

Report Inappropriate Comment
LOVE_2_LAUGH 3/12/2011 12:09PM

    What a nice way to start your weekend. I didn't know a GPS system could work for pedestrians. I may have to get mine out and play with it, too. When I'm trying to set up a path to walk, I'll often times get in the car and drive it to check out the distance. GPS makes more sense.

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUNNY332 3/12/2011 12:04PM

    I agree with you and Sharon on Abba.

Sounds like a great morning walk. I have a head cold so have had problems sleeping. I feel like the "walking dead" right now so hoping I get some sleep tonight.

Hugs, Sunny

Report Inappropriate Comment
MNTWINSGAL 3/12/2011 12:01PM

    Sounds like a great morning! Here the roads and walkways are still covered in snow and ice and the wind is whipping around.....I think I'd like to trade with you, please!

And who wouldn't be motivated by listening to ABBA? Honestly, I can't not start dancing when I hear "Dancing Queen." In fact, I've set it to my cell phone ring tone.

Report Inappropriate Comment
CHRYS13 3/12/2011 11:46AM

    What an inspiration and motivator you are!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment

A long walk home

Friday, March 11, 2011

It was such a nice day, I decided I would leave the car in the downtown garage and walk home tonight. Tomorrow I'll reverse the trip to go pick it up. I live 6.64 miles from work, and this is a very friendly town for pedestrians. At least the neighborhoods I had to walk through are... through the college dwelling apartment area I used to live in before I got married back in my student days... on through some "church row" kinds of neighborhoods, and a broad tree-lined boulevard where lots of others were out and about running their dogs or strolling their kids or riding their bikes.

Getting closer to my own neighborhood, I walked across a small church-college campus, then through a park to my own little house. People are clearly glad to see Spring coming so close. Yesterday as I cleaned up the yard (about half done)... I could see the daffodils starting to shoot up their green fingers. You have to love the season of rebirth.

emoticon emoticon emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUNNY332 3/12/2011 11:33AM

    How wonderful! Glad you enjoyed your walk.


Report Inappropriate Comment
LOVE_2_LAUGH 3/12/2011 10:37AM

    Spring is such an uplifting time of year. I find myself with new hope and new enthusiasm. Hopefully that will translate over to my weight loss efforts.

Report Inappropriate Comment
BUGGYS 3/12/2011 10:02AM

    I love spring too and was able to get my grandkids outdoors for some much needed play...we walked, we noticed some crocuses and robins...tis the season of renewal! emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LEANJEAN6 3/12/2011 9:22AM

    Good way to get yer fitness in!!! We just have old winter up here still----- Good for yu girl!

Report Inappropriate Comment
FITFABJENN 3/12/2011 9:22AM

    Kudos for taking advantage of the nice weather and getting in some exercise, too!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MEDDYPEDDY 3/12/2011 9:05AM

    There is still a lot of snow left but the sun is doing a good job every day... I canīt wait! Nice walk!

Report Inappropriate Comment
CONCHA77 3/12/2011 8:51AM

    Sounds like a great day. We won't be seeing signs of Spring for another couple of weeks up here. I love Spring! emoticon
Enjoy your walk back. Happy Saturday.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MSLZZY 3/12/2011 7:58AM

    Excellent idea! HUGS and here's to spring!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBRITA01 3/12/2011 6:42AM

    emoticonI think everyone will welcome the opportunity to enjoy the outdoors. That was a good walk...and you get to do it again today! Enjoy it...

Report Inappropriate Comment
KASEYCOFF 3/12/2011 4:27AM

    Good way to get in a nice walk!

Daffodils: they're out here. A veritable host, a crowd of daffodils, lol...
(No daffodils on the emoticons!)

Report Inappropriate Comment
DAISY443 3/12/2011 4:09AM

    Ahhh, the amazing thing about your walk was that you were aware-aware of the people around you, the beauty of the landscape. So much better than mindless walking! Hugs!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MNTWINSGAL 3/12/2011 1:16AM

    Sounds like a great walk, Barb. Congrats on making such a healthy choice!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JHADZHIA 3/11/2011 11:43PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon
Fantastic! Good for you!
Watching the snow swirling around the window, I can see spring is a long way off for us..

Report Inappropriate Comment
MOMOF2TONI 3/11/2011 10:13PM

    Great job!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
REJ7777 3/11/2011 9:38PM

    emoticon I think we're all looking forward to Spring, and getting back outdoors more. Then again, we have to make the decision to actually get out there! Congratulations on your smart choice! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


Wednesday, March 09, 2011

A lot of us make lists: to-do lists, wish lists, the infamous "bucket list", lists of resolutions, list of goals. I have this list of things I was putting off doing, "Until the kids move out and the dog dies."

On this list are things to fix around the house: carpets to replace. Furniture to re-upholster. Things that if I did them while the dog still lived here, they'd be ruined in a month or six anyway. So... now I'm sorting through my list, trying to decide which project to take on first. It's a time of limitless opportunity.

No pressure, take it easy, take it slow. But on the other hand, isn't that also how I got to where I am with fitness? One small step at a time!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSLZZY 3/11/2011 6:36AM

    Positive attitude! HUGS!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUNNY332 3/10/2011 3:04PM

    I use to be a list maker but haven't been as good about it since I retired. I have noticed I don't seem to get as much done either so I am going back to making the lists.

Thanks for posting this - it was something I really needed to read.

Hugs, Sunny

Report Inappropriate Comment
BUGGYS 3/10/2011 11:54AM

    I am forever making lists and just added to my master list to gut the master bathroom and start's not a big bathroom but need upgrading desperately. I also need to clean out the clutter. Lists keep me motivated to get things done!

Report Inappropriate Comment
ROCKLAND2010 3/10/2011 8:31AM

    I am also a 'list' person. Just making the list gives me a sense of accomplishment.
Items on a list are goals. Good job with the list!


Report Inappropriate Comment
DAISY443 3/10/2011 4:13AM

    I have that list, too! Along with my list to do today, my list of things I didn't do yesterday, my long term goals list, and on and on! Fortunately, the world doesn't come to an end if I don't get everything on my list done!

Report Inappropriate Comment
REJ7777 3/10/2011 1:26AM

    I guess every major change brings it's own *list* of challenges and "to do's". emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LOVE_2_LAUGH 3/9/2011 11:09PM

    Lists are the best. They keep me organized and goal-directed. A little something I've been lacking lately. I may have to make a few lists of my own.

Report Inappropriate Comment
HOT4FITNESS 3/9/2011 10:03PM

    Yes, one small step at a time. Sounds like the 10 mile walk is on that list of "to do's"

Report Inappropriate Comment

First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 257 258 259 260 261 262 263 264 265 266 267 268 269 270 271 272 273 274 275 276 277 278 279 280 281 282 283 284 285 286 287 288 289 290 291 292 293 294 295 296 297 298 299 300 301 302 303 304 305 306 307 308 309 310 311 312 313 314 315 316 317 318 319 320 321 322 323 324 325 326 327 328 329 330 331 332 333 334 335 336 337 338 339 340 341 342 343 344 345 346 347 348 349 Last Page