Tuesday, October 08, 2013
I weighed my self on Sunday morning to check in after a month away from SP. I wasn't sure about trusting the number on the scale, so I wanted to weigh myself again to double check. This morning right after I got up, I jumped on the scale and the number remained the same. Last month I was just over 201 lbs. This morning I am holding steady at 198.4 lbs.
I was sure that I had gained weight due to my lack of exercise and bad nutrition choices. But, I guess that some of the habits over the summer stuck. Perhaps I have been eating worse, but still not as bad as my pre-Spark days? Still, it doesn't make enough logical sense in my mind to allow me to celebrate being under the 200 lbs mark.
I am still eating worse than I was. My jeans still feel tighter as if I am bloated. i still have a lack of energy I was not experiencing before. To me, this is all more important than the number on the scale.
Of course, part of my old exercise routine was weight resistance training. I haven't touched my dumbells in a month. I realize muscle weighs more than fat, but could it be that I have lost muscle mass so quickly? That would explain the number dwindling on the scale while I still feel like I've gained weight. Yet, it is hard to believe that such a quick drop is possible.
My goal for this week is to focus on restarting my weight lifting program.
Saturday, October 05, 2013
Wow, it has been almost an entire month since I have had the chance the log on to SP. Classes are literally killing me this semester. I have broken my exercise streak -- I was 3/4 of the way to 100 days! :( I have also started grabbing quick meals (ie, super unhealthy) and let life get away from me.
Last month, I was starting to realize how much a part SP was actually playing in my journey into healthy living. Now, I fully understand SP's impact. The site is a way to help remind myself of the long term, to remind myself that I need to working on this daily and that each day is its own. By the latter, I mean that if I fail one day it doesn't mean it has to become a habit. I can turn things around asap.
Instead, this last month, not being able to get onto SP, I have reverted to my old unhealthy habits. I am not only making worse food choices, but I am also eating so much more food each day.
I have been afraid to get on the scale, out of fear of how much weight I must have gained, but I have decided to first thing tomorrow morning. Instead of bouncing back after a bad day, I will bounce back after a bad month. I just have to focus on the fact that I am still bouncing back!!
I was unable to go bungee jumping to pre-celebrate my upcoming birthday because there are no longer any open jump sites within 3 hours from where I am. However, I did make my goal weight of under 200 lbs (I was 195 at the time), and was able to go skydiving.
I am hooked on the adrenaline rush!! Tomorrow, after I weigh in, I will set a short term goal weight and set aside the money (since I have it now) to jump again. How can I fail with such a reward hanging over my head??
Saturday, September 07, 2013
For myself, I had to mark this point on my journey. I am just so confused! All of July and the beginning of August I watched what I ate and consciously paid attention to my workouts, focusing on their intensity. Since classes began, I have unfortunately slowed down quite a bit.
No longer tracking my food due to the time it takes, I have been relying on making healthier decisions. But there have been days where time is of the essence and I have grabbed whatever I could. I have even stooped to munching on some sugary treats -- those which I had all but given up. I also try to study while working out to multi-task, so my intensity has dropped in order to stay alert and keep focus. However, I have spent some days going with that low intensity and working out much longer that usual.
With all these changes, I had anticipated to have gained a pound or two when I got on the scale this morning. With more bread intake (like the night we ordered pizza) and a load more cheese than I spent the summer sparingly eating has left me feeling bloated and puffy. My greatest hope this morning was that I would see only a 1 pound gain.
However, the scale this morning read 201.4! That's almost a 2 pound loss!! I still can't believe it. I am so confused with my body and the way it responds to changes sometimes. To be honest, I am also slightly frustrated. All that work I did those many weeks, all the times I struggled to stay on course, and I lose the same amount while not even trying.
I know this is a ridiculous train of thought. My body is probably just shocked by this past week and will start gaining weight if I keep it up. I am still going to try to continue a healthy nutritional intake and some long but low intensity workouts. Yet, I am worried about my next planned weigh in. A lot can happen in two weeks, and apparently I don't know my body all that well.
Wednesday, September 04, 2013
Since school has started back in session again, I realize I have been taking my healthy living down a notch. I am working at being creative in finding ways to workout and eat small, healthy meals, but I am noticing a huge change in the past week and a half. Lately, my drive has been missing. Or, better put, my energy seems to be lacking.
I know that when I workout, I crave less junk food -- well, less food in general. I don't desire all the extras and it is easier to say no when I think about munching out of boredom. I also find it easier to start exercising each day, that initial movement off the couch and onto the treadmill.
But dropping my intensity and increasing my calories on some quick meals I have been forced to throw together, I am feeling so lackadaisical. I don't want to work out, I don't want to make a salad with my meal, I don't even want to focus on my studies.
I know this is something we all have to push through at times, but it feels like more. It was just so much easier to stay in the habit when I was more focused on eating healthy and physically moving. Now that my attention is divided....
Saturday, August 31, 2013
Though things have been difficult this past week in regards to keeping up the eating and workout habits regimes I implemented this summer, I didn't fall off the wagon completely. I am disappointed that I was not able to keep up, this being only the first week of classes, but I have come to accept that reality.
I may have slowed down a bit, working out less and with less intensity, but I am still working out. I may have stopped tracking my food and ate more calories/worse food than this summer, but I have attempted to track (getting half days) and been much more conscious of the food I am eating than I was last school year.
What I really need to do right now is return to the mindset I had at the beginning of summer -- when I first started using all SP had to offer. It was a moment in life when I started with small, attainable goals and built onto them as the weeks passed. In order to succeed now, I feel that I need to slowly re-implement the changes I had made over the summer.
In a way, this feels like a failure, to let go and choose to backpedal to where I first began. But, on the other hand, it is a huge victory for me -- I am not quitting, nor will I quit!
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