Sunday, November 10, 2013
I don't know where to start with the last couple of days. Thursday was okay I got my T25 video in. It was Dynamic Core and it was better than last week when I did it for the first time. Still burned my abs like crazy but less than last time. I think food was also okay. I do believe I met all my ranges.
Then there came Friday. I did sooooo well exercise wise on Friday. I did THREE videos. I did Core Cardio which is one hell of a cardio video and Rip' T Circuit which is a mixture of cardio and strength training and my Stretch video which was outstanding from last week Sunday. Now let me just say that I did all these back to back and was utterly exhausted at the end but I felt good . I was on track with food all the way to dinner then I was going to have m evening cookie and I saw a chocolate bar which I bought in the hopes that I could have it in moderation. Despite knowing better I said okay I'll have a little piece which then became the whole bar which then became some cookies and some more cookies and some more cookies. Eventually I stopped feeling sooooo disappointed in myself but then I told myself "oh I'll make up for it." I won't eat anything tomorrow. I knew better but that's what I decided.
Anyway then came Saturday. I woke up did two videos, Speed 2.0 which I again had improved upon and Upper Focus another strength video. I was feeling so good. Then I showered, brushed my teeth and foolishly decided to go watch Cutthroat Kitchen. Then of course I began to feel hungry and I told myself I'd have one pack of a cheese snack I love. Suffice it to say that one of the worst binges that I've had in months followed. Words can't describe how disappointed and angered I was, tears are filling my eyes now as I remember it and write about it. I was soooo angered because I had laid there and undone so much effort. I was working soooo hard with my exercise to the point that I had even injured my back. Yep there was more bad. By mid-afternoon I started feeling awful lower back pain with the slightest movements. It seems I had went a little too hard with me exercising. So anyway there I was undoing all that effort for what, food that had stopped tasting good hours ago but which I kept eating. I was in an awful place but then the Lord intervened through a call from a husband.
I thank God for that call and I thank God for him. The call actually started with an argument because I was taking out my anger on him but then I broke down in tears and confessed everything that was going on. Being who he is he of course consoled me and comforted me and then he became blunt. He was like "Chalecia c'mon what are your options here, brush yourself off, pick up the pieces and move on. You're not going to give up now, look at how far you've come so put it behind you." Then he told me that from then on I'd need to tell him immediately when I overate and think about how uncomfortable that made me. Folks I love that man. That little pep talk changed my outlook and my everything considerably. I decided listen this has happened and by the grace of God it aint happening again. Yea I may have caused myself to regain a lb or two this past week but tomorrow is a new day. I may have taken one step back but I'm going to take two steps forward. My goal will be reached even if the time it takes to get there just got a little longer.
So anyway that's what has been going on. That's why I haven't been blogging. I honestly couldn't face you all. I din't want to admit my "failure" but then today Ginger and Kim left me just some simple inquiries about how I was that reminded me that love is there through the "failures" and the successes. So thank you guys, I love you all. I'm ready to get back on that horse, back pain and all.
P.S. Please pray for the back pain because it's still here even though I took the day off exercising today re the husband's orders hoping it would feel better. I hope it's gone by tomorrow because I really want to be a part of that Biggest Loser Challenge in the Weight For God team.