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WILDXANGELS's Recent Blog Entries

never give up

Sunday, December 21, 2014

I have been on WW over 5 years. My total loss is 160 pounds. I am struggling lately to see a loss on the scale. I won't give up. I make decisions, minute to minute, meal to meal, day to day that help me stay on track. I have decided my health is worth the struggle. Knowing indulgences and mistakes and stress are going to happen, I will continue to do my imperfect best anyway, everyday!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KNYAGENYA 12/22/2014 6:56AM

    That is a wonderful accomplishment.

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BUSYGRANNY5 12/22/2014 6:10AM

    Wowzer 160 pounds... that's awesome! I hope you've allowed yourself plenty of time to celebrate your success!! You've got this!! Keep on keeping on!!!

Blessings!!!

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TENNISJIM 12/22/2014 5:45AM

    Congrats on 160 lbs. One day at a time.

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PURPLEPEONY 12/22/2014 5:27AM

    We all have times the scale seems to stop moving. emoticon emoticon

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LJCANNON 12/22/2014 12:07AM

    emoticon I could just about have written this Blog myself. It IS a Struggle, and I Do make mistakes, but I will keep pressing on because My Health and My Future Is Worth It!!


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DJ4HEALTH 12/21/2014 10:24PM

    You can do it and try changing with workout too since your body gets used to the workout that you do for a while too.

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CAROL494 12/21/2014 10:12PM

  emoticon emoticon

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SICK AND TIRED OF BEING SICK AND TIRED

Friday, December 19, 2014

I woke up full of hurt,anger and hate,i have been praying over it and doing all that i know how to do and going to meetings and doctors but it is not getting any better and i am at a loss what to do at this point.I need to move into a new environment but have no money or family to help so i am having a hard time being able to do this,if anyone has any suggestions that would be great,ty.I have been sober long enough to figure this out but i cant.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MT-MOONCHASER 12/21/2014 3:15PM

    There should be a department at Social Services (or whatever they are calling the welfare department in you area) that can provide guidance for you. They may also be able to provide monetary assistance. Don't be too proud to ask for the help. When you are able, you can help pay it forward.

emoticon

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RAINBOWFALLS 12/21/2014 9:01AM

    emoticon I sure hope things turn around for you

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ALEXSGIRL1 12/19/2014 9:37AM

    emoticon

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NELLJONES 12/19/2014 8:03AM

    I'm with MaryJoanna. Nothing happens in God's world by accident, and it takes eyes other than yours to try to see your life as God sees it.

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-WRKNG2ABTTRME- 12/19/2014 7:55AM

    emoticon emoticon

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KNYAGENYA 12/19/2014 7:53AM

    emoticon

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BUSYGRANNY5 12/19/2014 6:59AM

    You've received some great advice from other members here, I'd just like to add one make sure you KNOW what you want.. when that is clear in your mind... set some very specific and attainable goals....make a plan.... follow it.... but willing to regroup as needed!

Most importantly look to the LORD and fully rely on him for GUIDANCE...

Blessings!

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TENNISJIM 12/19/2014 6:38AM

    My hopes and prayers are with during this difficult time

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FRIDA11 12/19/2014 5:50AM

    I do understand that you see it would be nice with a new enviroment if you feel stuck in a box, where you do no longer belong..
I have 2 suggestions:
1. Be a member of a new group in your state(not internet but in real life) where you can be without the old image stuck to you. It may be voluntary work political work - maybe struggling for an issue.
Do this at once...
2. Get yourself noted for a place to live in another state, where you can afford the rent.
When you get an offer after waiting for ... you can say no if you are happy about your new group.

It is said it takes about 2 years to get out of an addiction. Foodaddiction, alcohol, drugs.. One thing is stopping, another thing is forming new attitudes.
Have luck and a happy New year

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RD03875 12/19/2014 5:40AM

    Go to a woman's shelter

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MARYJOANNA 12/19/2014 5:34AM

  Find a good, Bible believing church and get involved. Forget about yourself and be a friend to others.

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alone

Tuesday, December 09, 2014

have no family that will take me in or help me,i found out today my daughters moving a girl into my moms room so cuz she has no family,a stranger,guess i am not family.this is hurting me bad but they dont care.i told her and she calls me "dumb" cuz i feel hurt and feel the way i do,that they should be helping their mother not some stranger.I wont eat over it....

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BELTONWALKER67 12/12/2014 1:13PM

    You are never alone! God loves you and is always with you.

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MSLZZY 12/12/2014 5:59AM

    emoticon

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STITCH4EVER 12/11/2014 3:48PM

    I'M SO SORRY YOU ARE GOING THROUGH THIS. I KNOW HOW MUCH IT HURTS WHEN FAMILY DOESN'T TREAT YOU LIKE FAMILY SHOULD. ALL I CAN DO FOR YOU IS PRAY.

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BLONDEDOG 12/10/2014 3:00PM

    I'm so sorry to hear and I hope things look up soon.

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NELLIEC 12/10/2014 12:50PM

    Sometimes family members can be clueless. Good that you aren't comforting yourself with food!

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GAL7288 12/10/2014 11:11AM

    I am so sorry, Stay strong not for them but for yourself. Sending you hugs

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KNYAGENYA 12/10/2014 8:00AM

    emoticon

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TENNISJIM 12/10/2014 6:41AM

    really?

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PURPLEPEONY 12/9/2014 10:44PM

    emoticon emoticon

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KALANTHA 12/9/2014 7:34PM

    emoticon

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-WRKNG2ABTTRME- 12/9/2014 4:45PM

    emoticon

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ALEXSGIRL1 12/9/2014 4:30PM

    emoticon Please eat you need to stay healthy I am sorry this is happening to you

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UMBILICAL 12/9/2014 2:09PM

  Stranger

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food was a old friend no more

Tuesday, December 09, 2014

Last night I had a lot of emotions I was repressing and it turned into a numbing anger. Before I realized I was going down that road (which often leads to depression), I was acting out in anger and also tried "soothing" myself with food (it did nothing for me and felt pointless). I finally allowed the emotions to surface and cried even though it felt silly at the time. I was hiding behind the anger because I didn't feel like my hurt was justified, therefore, not allowing myself to feel. I felt like I had a breakthrough and food no longer satisfies me the way it once did, however, sometimes knowing I can't go to food makes me feel empty. For example, we were driving around looking at Christmas lights I found myself feeling sad that I wasn't having hot cocoa along for the ride. Sometimes I feel empty, almost displaced when I don't have my security blanket of food. Even though it may sound like it, I'm really not having a pity party about not being able to eat compulsively! I am simply trying to work through the grief that sometimes surfaces concerning food and its place in my life. I wanted to know if anyone else has experienced this and how did you work through it? It is hard for me to put this out there so please be kind! I miss my mom.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SMITHKRISTI 12/18/2014 7:42AM

    emoticon

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SMITHKRISTI 12/16/2014 8:09AM

    emoticon emoticon

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FRIDA11 12/15/2014 3:29AM

    Dealing with grief -
Try to find a balance between some times letting the tears fall and dealing with the feelings.. Maybe you can write in a private book about what you feel by the loss and about happy events with your Mum..
Other times it is necessary to find out what makes you happy - besides food.. and allow yourself to do these things - You are worth it
Try to make cocoa with real cocoa powder and boiling water and no sugar in it. This gives the Magnesium - lack of magnesium makes people vulnerable to depression - This gives some of the comfort that hot chocolate gives. And a lot less calories.

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FRIDA11 12/15/2014 3:28AM

    Dealing with grief -
Try to find a balance between some times letting the tears fall and dealing with the feelings.. Maybe you can write in a private book about what you feel by the loss and about happy events with your Mum..
Other times it is necessary to find out what makes you happy - besides food.. and allow yourself to do these things - You are worth it
Try to make cocoa with real cocoa powder and boiling water and no sugar in it. This gives the Magnesium - lack of magnesium makes people vulnerable to depression - This gives some of the comfort that hot chocolate gives. And a lot less calories.

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PURPLEPEONY 12/9/2014 10:46PM

    emoticon

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ALEXSGIRL1 12/9/2014 4:36PM

    I used to comfort myself with food now when I feel sad I watch my favorite tv show or go for a walk with uplifting music . hugs

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TREKPURRSON 12/9/2014 3:56PM

    emoticon emoticon

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NELLIEC 12/9/2014 1:56PM

    Many people associate food with their mom since their mother provided that during their early years.

However, I have different association about food and my mother. She died at age 47 weighing 77 lb. and she was 5'6". She looked like those POW pictures of people starved. I also understand why since I inherited her tendency to have intestinal issues. I went through the torture of my innards twisting in agony every time I ate. I ate to prevent the same destiny as she had, but I still lost 50 lb. in three months without trying to. It turned out that my bowels were blocked and I had to have emergency surgery. Since the dietician at the hospital was desperately trying to have me gain weight after the surgery, I did -- and overdid it a little. Now with SP I eat according to their guidelines and am a healthy weight.

I do understand that association of food and comforting since for most of my childhood I had warm chocolate milk right before bedtime.

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COOP9002 12/9/2014 11:24AM

    Glad to hear that you've found some peace with yourself regarding this struggle. blessings to you as you continue this journey.

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ITSMESHE 12/9/2014 10:18AM

    It sounds like you are learning to deal with life situations - it's hard and takes time and effort. Thanks for sharing.
My heart is with you.
emoticon Sheila

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NELLJONES 12/9/2014 8:34AM

    I still comfort myself with food, but it's a planned, comforting, legal meal. As you discover new comforts, you'll move on. When was the last time you reached for a pacifier and satin blanket? Different things provide that comfort as life goes by. As a child, your parents altered the comforting items. Now you choose what will come next.

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GOLFGMA 12/9/2014 8:11AM

    Food can be a comfort or an enemy. I think you have discovered which it is. Sorry, I don't have an answer for getting past it other than to have strength knowing it is possible if we keep trying each day. emoticon

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PEZMOM1 12/9/2014 7:58AM

    emoticon

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KNYAGENYA 12/9/2014 7:52AM

    Have you worked through your grief over your mom? Maybe if you do this the feelings will be taken care of and you won't need the comfort of the food. I developed a hobby to help with my anxiety and to keep my hands busy...now I run my own knitting charity.

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BUSYGRANNY5 12/9/2014 6:52AM

    Good for you for facing your emotions head on and not "stuffing" them with food! Your feelings and emotions are a normal part of the grieving process. Keep on keeping on and be patient with yourself!

Blessings!

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MSLZZY 12/9/2014 6:25AM

    You needed to do that so you can move on. Have a better day!

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TENNISJIM 12/9/2014 6:24AM

    Thank you for sharing your story

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my blessing for you

Tuesday, December 09, 2014

For each and everyone of you that is having a tough time, pain or issues of any kind, I wish to say to you that your not alone and loved. I wish to also send you my smiles, laughs, happiness, positive vibes, peace, harmony, understanding, kindness, caring, strength, compassion, passion, my hopes, wishes and dreams, gentle hugs, tender kisses, warm embraces, soft whispers and love from all my heart, mind, body and soul just to give you a chance at less pain...peace, happiness and love to you all always

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SMITHKRISTI 12/11/2014 9:28AM

    emoticon

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ALEXSGIRL1 12/9/2014 4:37PM

    emoticon emoticon

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TREKPURRSON 12/9/2014 3:57PM

    emoticon

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FORZACHANDMATT 12/9/2014 3:03PM

    That is beautiful and much appreciated - thanks and the same to you

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ITSMESHE 12/9/2014 10:19AM

    emoticon Thank you! Remember your friends at Spark are sending the same to you.
Sheila

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PATTYKLAVER 12/9/2014 9:30AM

    My wish for you is that you have the same and much more.

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ADIRONDACKMOM 12/9/2014 8:08AM

    How sweet-- to you also!!!

emoticon emoticon

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BUSYGRANNY5 12/9/2014 6:53AM

    Right back at you! Have a blessed day!!!

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TENNISJIM 12/9/2014 6:26AM

    Thank you. Returning peace, understanding, kindness....back to you

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MSLZZY 12/9/2014 6:26AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MONTREALESTMOI 12/9/2014 5:55AM

    Aw! You're sweet!

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SORTIZA99 12/9/2014 5:43AM

    Nice sharing.
Best regards.

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