Monday, August 04, 2014
I'll be the first to admit I was blown away when I received an email from SparkPeople last night informing me that I was selected as today's Featured Motivator.
I do my best to try to make others feel that they're not alone, because they're not.
As you have seen lately, I've been slipping. I've gotten comfortable, which I think is a horrible word, because I don't feel comfortable. I feel fat again. My pants are tight, my shirts are tight, I won't wear my bikini without a shirt on. I feel comfortable as in: Sure, let's get our 1/2 price shakes at Sonic, let's try that new pretzel bun burger at Wendy's, let's grab pizza on the way home.
The weather in AZ sucks right now. We've had haboobs, which makes running and hiking unsafe. The air is muggy and dirty. We'll have rains just long enough to make our cars dirtier, leaving terrain unsettled and dangerous. Thunderstorms and lightning that shake the ground. Basically, I've been feeling like I don't want to work out indoors because I love being outdoors. So I haven't.
And here I am, twenty pounds heavier than I was at my brother's wedding 10 months ago. 2 pounds a month isn't horrible, you say. Well, I could have gone the other way and lost those 20 pounds to reach my goal for my move-in date.
Obviously that didn't happen. Sometimes I feel that I don't deserve your accolades and kind words. Sometimes I feel like a fraud. I'm trying, but I could try harder. I jog, but I could jog more often. I eat, but I should eat smaller portions.
I motivate, but I could do a better job of it. In three weeks, when I'm moved in to my new house (woo hoo!!), I will have home internet access and will be better able to participate again. I can't wait!!
Thank you for entrusting me with your stories: both setbacks and triumphs. I do not take you for granted.
All my love. XOXO
Monday, July 14, 2014
Bizarre blog title? Maybe so, but bear with me.
I was thinking about my progress the other day, which led me to think about prior times I had attempted to lose weight. This led me to the poignant conclusion that we are not cookie cutter.
And thank God for that, right? How boring life would be! However, it also means that the answer for me is not necessarily the answer for you.
My banana is your apple.
And this is where life becomes tricky. I can tell you about my hikes and jogs and meals, triumphs and letdowns. This should not be construed as any type of 'guarantee'.
Your medical conditions, past experiences, location and preferences could (and should) lead you in a completely different direction, ultimately meeting up with me when our roads cross paths again.
What works for me isn't a slam dunk for others. Heck, it may only be one for me for a short time before I need to step up my game. If I ever talk about something that hasn't worked for me, I'm not recommending that you don't try it. I'm just telling my story. Just because I don't like mushrooms doesn't mean everyone should boycott them, you know?
I guess all I'm trying to say is: DO YOU. Heed some advice. Don't feel bad if you don't take others. Does it feel right for you? Then go for it! Do you know that a certain exercise will kill your bad knees? Modify!
Be smart. Be safe. Have fun. Grunt. Groan. Scream. Sweat. Smile. Laugh. Cry. Love.
Friday, June 27, 2014
Was my last blog seriously written in April?!?!? Man oh man...
Well, life + lack of computer with internet access leads to long posts that are few and far between.
I have slacked a little. I've gained a little weight. Nothing too dramatic, but enough for the pants to feel a little tight. I will not be ashamed of this, or embarrassed by it. It is what it is and I can't go back and change my poor choices. I even updated my stats on my weight ticker. However, I have been working out and eating better for the past two weeks. About 5 of those pounds have melted away yet again.
Every once in awhile, I participate in the Throw Back Thursday picture tag that happens on facebook, twitter and instagram - you know, the #TBT posts. I posted this one on my FB community page:
The image to the left would have been somewhere in the 2005-2007 range. The image to the right is from October 2013.
Sometimes you really don't realize the changes your body has gone through. I mean, I was there. I saw pants get bigger as my waist shrank. I saw my love of water grow as sodas became too sweet. I saw it all happening day by day. When I step back and see these pictures, I see my journey all wrapped up in one moment in time. It's kinda cool.
I wish all of you this moment. That moment you question: that was me, so how can this be me, too? It's a crazy, weird, unbelievable moment. Feel it. Live it. That WAS you. And this CAN be you.
Enjoy the ride.
Until next time, my Lovelies...
Tuesday, April 15, 2014
So here I am, trying to make a goal. Trying to pick a meaningful, realistic goal weight. Trying to pick a meaningful date for 'completion'.
Completion. What a silly word to use. I reckon it's the day where I say, "Look at me!! I did it!!"
What have I done? Am I going to stop? Does that date mean that I won't work out or eat healthy ever again. Of course not. Silly word.
Completion. Just a little date that means nothing. And yet it still means everything.
Goals are tied into dates. It is inevitable. High school reunions. Weddings. Knowing you'll be running into your ex somewhere on a certain day.
I've changed my 'completion' date so many times. I've pushed it back. I've scooted it up. I've removed it. I've added it. I've yelled at it.
And that's okay. Because while that little date means nothing, it means everything.
It's what you hold onto and strive towards. It's a little motivator. A little bit of Shelby-I-Saw-You-Eat-That-Cookie. A little bit of You-Better-Give-Me-Ten-More-Pushups.
I've picked my weight.
160 pounds. Not set in stone, but it's a healthy number in the middle of my BMI range.
And I've picked my date.
Mid-August 2014. The specific date is not yet confirmed, but it'll be the day 'A' and I move in together. That day will be a new beginning. The beginning of us. THE beginning of everything. Clean slates, new house, new rules, new dynamic.
Four Months. Twenty pounds.
Ready. Set. Go.
Thursday, March 27, 2014
This blog really doesn't have anything to do with my journey in weight loss, but a large amount to do with my personal journey. I'm basically bursting at the seams, trying to maintain some sort of composure.
It's not working out that well, and the thing won't be happening for about 6 more months, but still...When something changes, I get all giddy :)
'A' and I will be moving in together (along with his son) when my lease is up at the end of September. It's a huge step and we're both excited to take it. We've already got our eyes on one house (yes, I finally get to move into a house. Bye bye apartment living!!) And we are sharing links daily for other houses, areas and ideas for our lives together. From budgeting to chores, you name it, we're covering it :)
Happy Shelby, signing off.
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