Thursday, December 10, 2009
Recently, I viewed a video online about a 35 year old woman who is a CrossFit Athlete. She said "Your mind wants to quit long before your body ever does."
I had already discovered that about myself when lifting weights one day. My head told me that I couldn't lift more than X and when I said "Let's see just how far we can take this." I lifted 3X (deadlifts). I was sore the next day, but not excessively. I had to know. I didn't settle for a previous limitation, I pushed it. A few days later, I added 10 more lbs to the 3X.
Where this lady's voice kept resounding with me, though, was during my run yesterday. I haven't run more than 2.5 miles in over 10 years. So, there's the first limitation - 3+ miles has NOT been done (see the 'NO' in there?).
The next thing that came to mind was when I did run those 2.5 miles, it took me 36 minutes. At that pace, I will be at this forever. (do you see the negative thought going on there?)
While I was putting my shoes on, I thought back to when I DID run further and faster. I realized that the limiting factors here today weren't my body's ability necessarily. It was all in my head.
For someone who is constantly preaching at my family to never say "I can't" to themselves, it was so funny and sad to face my own "I can't".
So I said it out loud. "I think I can." (I know, you're all being reminded right now of that little train that could. LOL) Sometimes, for your brain to 'hear' you, you must say things out loud. If you're around people, go somewhere to be alone and TELL yourself what you desperately NEED to hear: I CAN
I broke through more than one barrier physically yesterday. I re-found my pace. My hips, legs and feet function best at 5mph and over. 5.5 to 6 is perfect. I caught myself checking my heart rate. Guess what? I had hesitance at high heart rates and wanted to slow down. My body didn't, my legs were loving this. I have much less achiness today than when I run at lower speeds. Hmmm....
I only slowed down when I couldn't draw a long deep breath. And when I did, I only gave myself enough time to get that breath.
I ran 3.17 miles in 40.36 minutes. So much for 2.5 miles making me so sore I couldn't walk the next day.
Be mindful of your self talk. Don't just accept previous limitations. Push them every chance you get.
Yes, You CAN
Wednesday, December 02, 2009
live close to the ground. In thinking, keep to the simple. In conflict, be fair and generous. In governing, don't try to control. In work, do what you enjoy. In family life, be completely present. --Lao Tzu
Do you have everything you desire? Are you as great as you could be?
I do. I am. My life is EXACTLY the way it is supposed to be. I am who I want to be.
I've gone through the entire spectrum - I had wild times, had a few flings, had one serious young man lay the material world at my feet, experienced numerous personal and professional successes (my favorite was when one of the better restaurants in town at the time offered me their upcoming catering section - ME!), I benched my own weight over 10 years ago and I will again - sooner than you think, had a couple of crazies decide I was the answer to whatever question it was the voices in their heads kept asking. One of them told me she was my biggest 'fan'.
I chose my soul mate over the Bentley and fancy dinners. I chose my children over a career that would have us living in double the house we do now. Although I do still freelance some, I turn work away regularly. I chose a somewhat simple existence with no crazies, no voices, no fans. I chose sneers and slights from people who only a few years ago would have looked at me as their equal. Because I have made the choices I have, many look down at me. The quest for material wealth does not make a person better. It MIGHT make them wealthier, but things don't make you better, happier, wiser.
My great grandmother was born into captivity in Ft. Sill, OK. (Geronimo was also a prisoner there and as a child, she would sit with the other children and listen to his stories.) She always said that everything that you own also owns you and that if you're not careful, you can become a slave to your things and have no life, just a lot of things. How smart is that? And very true.
I am completely satisfied with my choices and have a good life. We are comfortable. Our house is my age and is not absolutely perfect, but the things to be done aren't huge. I will get to them. I WANT to do them myself. I want my home to be of my work - my craftsmanship.
Choices. Everything you do is a choice. Choose well and you will be happy. Happiness is wealth that no one can take away from you.
Choose things that are motivated by or for other people and you will lose yourself over and over. With each small piece of the self lost to another's goals, peace and happiness will erode as well.
Make the right choice for YOURSELF. If you have to try and sell someone else on your choice to feel right or good about it, you need to re-think your choice.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
(ok, forgive the repeat. the same entry for yesterday got deleted. User error or deficiency or something like that....) :)
There are two things I am grateful to my disease for: the emergence of my creative side and nowadays I stop and think about things (sometimes for a long time) before I act.
For the most part.
Been sittin' on the fence about something. Not much of a fence sitter. Really - after a certain amount of time has passed, I begin urging myself for a decision. If none can be reached, I put it on the back burner for a while and move on. Revisit the issue later instead of driving myself nuts.
My friend Steph has been doing Cross Fit for some time now. She's looking AWESOME. Really. I have gone and read about it and looked into and even tried some of the workouts. WOW, intense!
I became very interested in CF. The intensity seemed to be natural match for my nature - ever since I picked up my dad in our kitchen when I was 6, I've enjoyed feeling my body's strength and increasing it.
At the same time, the CF workouts shined a big ol' spotlight right on my weaknesses which really rubbed me the wrong way. Especially my balance. I don't expect to be perfect on my first few times out on anything - honest. But I do like to see improvements within a few tries.
When I do something that seemed to almost be planned to show my weaknesses, I almost feel picked on. LOL
Really, I wondered at one point "Is there ONE workout I can do that doesn't make me look like a _______________(insert feable sentiment here)?" It made me feel better when someone else admitted that it had made her feel the same way.
My first thought was to just go back to the old way. Get on the free weights and never look back. I did just that for a couple of weeks and the whole time I was grunting out my reps I was thinking about Cross Fit and how I could feel more intensity and rawness in 20 minutes than this 60 minute workout was giving me.
hmmmm.... what to do?
Get my hands busy. When I'm painting or bending metal or building something, I think about the tasks at hand, but for some reason, it also helps me think. Better. Clearer.
I know, the smallness of this trouble seems like a drop in the bucket compared to some people's troubles. But this is the rest of my life we're talking about and my re-entry into serious fitness. Not just dabbling here and there.
Saturday as I was putting a new 50lb slide under one of my big kitchen drawers, it hit me. Almost like someone thumped me in the head. Duh.
So, I will be selling off my P90X and Cathe DVDs and using the money to buy some rings and a bar.
I am a Cross Fitter.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Just received an email - I have been voted a SparkPeople Motivator.
Cried a little. Read it again.
A very heartfelt THANK YOU.
Monday, November 02, 2009
I make bread at least once a week. Some weeks, it's as many as 2 or 3 times. I mill my own wheat and am thinking about growing wheat in the future.
Since early September, I have been skipping bread altogether to see if my inflammation abated. It actually did. I still had a few aches and pains and soreness from use and overuse - but it was never anything that woke me up in the middle of the night.
My awesome friend, Steph, made me a loaf of friendship bread with her white wheat and YUM, I started eating bread again. Not pigging out, but a slice a day. One day I had two. The bread was delicious, had a beautiful crust and a delicate crumb. Tasty as hell.
Unfortunately, during the week that I was eating bread, my inflammation also increased. :( During the week, I ran ONE mile, jumped rope, have painted our son's bedroom, built a corner shelf in there and cut moulding to put across the front of it. Sat on the floor cross legged for 1/2 hour putting new outlets in. I can honestly say that I don't think anything I've done since my run has been excessive activity for me. Really, after hauling at least 10 tons of dirt 1 wheelbarrow load at a time. If anything should have hurt, I would have thought it would be my shoulder or back from doing the ceiling. Nope. I should not have had pain that woke me up.
But I did. Two nights in a row, now, hip and leg pain has woke me up in the middle of the night and prohibited me from sleeping for some hours. Even with IBU and cherry extract (my friend for pain), it took 2 to 3 hours to get back to sleep.
The last time I hurt this bad was in the beginning of September when we were all getting on the motorcycles and riding to Mt. Lemmon, then Kitt Peak and finally Colossal Cave. Had a lot of sandwiches those days and while I didn't eat bad, it was a lot of bread.
I am aware that my disease makes one more prone to celiac and I don't really believe that I've developed it full on, but I seem to be having sensitivities. However, a few weeks off and one week on is hardly enough evidence.
So, I will be continuing this experiment and documenting my results.
Tucson had a couple of freezing to near-freezing nights recently. We got out there and put up lights and row covers to protect the tomatoes and okra. I think we managed to save everything we were trying to. The mortgage lifter tomato has finally started making fruit and I am very excited. This is the plant that makes 2.5 lb tomatoes. So far, they're getting quite large and are looking good. I hope to get at least one before the plants go. However, I do fully intend to keep the lights and covers going for as long as possible. I don't expect to be able to nurse a plant into next year, but I'm going to try anyway. :)
The garlic, shallots, bulb onions, peas, carrots, radishes and green onions and eggplants are up, but they're moving slowly. The older bell pepper plants are producing nicely. Einstein the cat tears branches off of them tho. He's going to get himself into real hot water if he doesn't stop trying to be the gardening cat.
I didn't plant the corn right. I planted my corn so that they would all come up around the same time. Well, they did. We got 7 to 9 foot tall stalks, every one of them tasseled and every one of them produced at least 2 cobs. The first 3 cobs to come off were gorgeous and tasty. Cobs came along after the tassels had already blown and there were MAYBE 10 to 20 edible kernels. :( I will do things differently with the corn next planting. Stagger plantings by 2 or 3 weeks so that production can continue and cut deeper rows so they can get more water more efficiently.
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