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    MARYJOANNA   194,510
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BROKEN LEG

Monday, April 18, 2016      13 comments

I fell in the house on Tuesday and broke my right leg. In 2010 I tripped in the hospital and broke my right ankle so am keeping everything on the right side. Ha! I came home on Saturday and there is nothing like being in your home! I have hom... Read more

TOOTING MY HORN

Friday, April 01, 2016      28 comments

I have to give a shout-out to me. Today is my birthday and I am 79 years young! I don't feel my age nor do I look it. I am healthy with no diabetes or arthritis. This is the day the Lord has made and I will rejoice and be glad in it!... Read more

POLICE

Tuesday, March 22, 2016      11 comments

While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, 'Are you a cop? Yes' I answered and continued writing the report. My mother s... Read more

ELDERLY

Tuesday, March 15, 2016      10 comments

While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly, I used to take my 4 year old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelch... Read more

NUDITY

Friday, March 11, 2016      12 comments

A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked,... Read more

LAUGHTER

Monday, March 07, 2016      10 comments

A defendant isn't happy with how things are going in court, so he gives the judge a hard time. Judge: "Where do you work?" Defendant: "Here and there." Judge: "What do you do for a living?" Defendant: "This and that." Jud... Read more

REFLECTION

Friday, March 04, 2016      9 comments

When you flee temptation don't leave a forwarding address!... Read more

THE PROPHET

Sunday, February 28, 2016      7 comments

A young woman stepped forward from the throng and asked, "O' great prophet, tell us how we might find love that is unconditional, unwavering and unending." The prophet did not answer right away. He looked off into the distance, gathering hi... Read more

YOUR MONTHLY PUN-ISHMENT

Wednesday, February 24, 2016      6 comments

A tiger was walking through the jungle one day and saw two men relaxing under a tree. One was reading a newspaper, and the other was working feverishly on a manual typewriter. The tiger leapt on the man with the newspaper... Read more

DEFINITION: BABY

Saturday, February 20, 2016      8 comments

A loud noise at oneend and no responsibility at the other.... Read more

REFLECTIONS

Wednesday, February 17, 2016      9 comments

THIS IS A FRIGHTENING STATISTIC, PROBABLY ONE OF THE MOST WORRISOME IN RECENT YEARS. 25% of the women in this country are on medication for mental illness. That's scary! It means 75% are running aro... Read more

OMG

Monday, February 15, 2016      10 comments

I have finally discovered what's wrong with my brain: On the left side there is nothing right, and on the right side, there is nothing left. ... Read more

PERKS OF REACHING 60 OR BEING OVER 70 AND HEADING TOWARDS 80!

Friday, February 12, 2016      9 comments

Kidnappers are not very interested in you. In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first. Things you buy won't wear out. You can live without sex but not your glasses. You can't remember who sen... Read more

UNTITLED

Wednesday, February 10, 2016      6 comments

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.... Read more

KIDS; KETCHUP

Monday, February 08, 2016      9 comments

A woman was trying hard to get the tomato sauce out of the bottle. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4 year old daughter to answer the phone. 'Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hittin... Read more


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