"There was a brief security scare yesterday when some party balloons drifted over the White House fence. The White House staff were pretty worried, especially when they saw Obama tying those balloons to a lawn chair." -Jimmy Fallon
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The Social Security check is now (or soon will be) referred to as a "Federal Benefit Payment!"
I'll be part of the one percent to forward this. I am forwarding it because it touches a nerve in me, and I hope it will in you. ... Read more
"Every appliance with a clock should have a Daylight Savings button to push. You'd only use it twice a year, but that's more than I use the 'Potato' button on my microwave." -Jimmy Kimmel
"It's Daylight Savings Time. Why does it ha... Read more
1 Put both lids of the toilet up and add 1/8 cup pet shampoo to the water in the bowl.
2 Pick up the cat and soothe him while you carry him to the bathroom.
3 In one smooth movement, put the cat in the toilet and close the lid. You may need... Read more
A racist walks into a crowded bar. He looks around and sees a black man sitting in a corner.
The racist walks up to the bar, turns around and announces, "I'm going to buy everyone in this bar a free drink, except for that black guy over the... Read more
John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, 'Here's to spending the rest of me life, between the legs of me wife!' That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night!
He went home and told his wife, 'Mary, I won the prize fo... Read more
My kids have always been observant of their surroundings, but they tend to pick out details no one else would notice. I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us s... Read more
Late Night Funny #1
Yesterday in Iowa, Sarah Palin gave a 20-minute speech to endorse Donald Trump for president, while Trump stood off to the side. Palin described Trump as a great leader, while Trump described being quiet for 20 minutes a... Read more
She was six years old when I first met her on the beach near where I live. I drive to this beach, a distance of three or four miles, whenever the world begins to close in on me. She was building a sand castle or something and looked up, her eye... Read more
In honor of Black History month: Check out this website:
politicalblindspot.com/t he-real-lone-ranger-was-an -african-american-lawman-w ho-lived-with-native-ameri can-indians/
Or copy and paste:
http:... Read more