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    SUNSHINE65   65,269
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Paraprosdokians

Thursday, July 04, 2013      14 comments

(Winston Churchill loved them) are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected; frequently humorous. Enjoy! 1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it. 2. The last thing I want to d... Read more

Perfect day!

Thursday, July 04, 2013      4 comments

When I married Donna, I could get both hands around her waist," said my husband's grandfather. Pointing at his full-figured wife, he boasted, "Now look how much I got. That's what I call an investment!" *** My wife's star sign was canc... Read more

Call in Fat?

Thursday, July 04, 2013      5 comments

President Obama spoke was in Germany and spoke at the Brandenburg Gate, which divided that city during the Cold War. Obama said itís taught me a lot. When I was a kid, West Germany taught me the importance of standing tall, and East Germany taug... Read more

Later fite nunnies

Tuesday, July 02, 2013      8 comments

The Supreme Court has overturned the Defense of Marriage Act. How about that? We don't need a Defense of Marriage Act. What we need in this country is a marriage cap. You're allowed three, and after that, you're done. -Jay Leno If DOMA i... Read more

IKEA wardrobe...

Tuesday, July 02, 2013      7 comments

A very well-known international furniture and interior decoration D.I.Y. Store recently set up a customer assistance department. The first call they got was from a lady who had purchased a wardrobe early in the morning. She explained that after ... Read more

Doctors vs. Guns

Sunday, June 30, 2013      8 comments

Doctors: The number of physicians in the U.S. is 700,000 Accidental deaths caused by Physicians per year are 120,000 Accidental deaths per physician is 0.171 Statistics courtesy of U.S. Dept of Health Human Services. ... Read more

We Are But Dust

Sunday, June 30, 2013      6 comments

A visiting minister at the start of the offertory prayer: "Dear Lord," he began with arms extended and a rapturous look on his upturned face, "without you we are but dust..." He would have continued, but at that moment one very obedi... Read more

Where do you stand on horse slaughtering?

Saturday, June 29, 2013      4 comments

wildhorsepreservation.or
g/media/reactions-usda-per
mitting-new-mexico-horse-s
laughter-plant org2.democracyinaction.o
rg/o/6931/p/dia/action/pub
lic/?action_KEY=13157 ... Read more

Fortune Cookie

Saturday, June 29, 2013      14 comments

... Read more

Late Night Funnies

Friday, June 28, 2013      8 comments

Sarah Palin has been hired back by Fox News, and she only left five months ago. She has now effectively quit quitting. She canít even commit to being uncommitted. -John Oliver President Obama is now in Ireland for the big G8 summit. Secu... Read more

DIFFERENCE BETWEEN WORK AND PRISON

Friday, June 28, 2013      7 comments

Prison vs. Work Just in case you ever got these two mixed up, This should make things a bit more clear. IN PRISON you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell. AT WORK you spend the majority of your time in a 6X8 cubicle. ... Read more

Diversity

Thursday, June 27, 2013      8 comments

Recently, a large corporation hired several cannibals to increase their diversity, "You are all part of our team now," said the Human Resources rep during the welcoming briefing. "You get all the usual benefits and you can go to the cafeteria fo... Read more

Best Round of Golf

Monday, June 24, 2013      4 comments

A man was at the country club for his weekly round of golf. He began his round with an eagle on the first hole and a birdie on the second. On the third hole he had just scored his first ever hole-in-one when his cell phone rang. It was a d... Read more

Words and what they mean...

Monday, June 24, 2013      8 comments

FINE This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman looks - this will cause you to have one of those arguments. FIVE MINUTES This is... Read more

What's that song?

Saturday, June 22, 2013      6 comments

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