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SparkPeople: Weekly Community Highlight
  Week of 2/4/2010 - Featured Blog Post

Finally I Know What I Want!
SUEZETTE-414



While I was grocery shopping yesterday, I happened down an aisle that was deserted except for me and another girl. She was young, I'd say around early to mid 20s. She was also overweight, not obese but close. I watched her for a few minutes. She was reading the nutrition on the back of a box. I started smiling, thinking about where I was 16 months ago and how I did (and still do) the same thing she was doing. It was at that point she turned and saw me. She gave me *the body scan* from head to toe, put the box down and QUICKLY left the aisle. I was a little stunned at first and I wanted to tell her "Hey, I know what you're going through and I just want to tell you that I've been where you are" but I didn't. I held back. Why would she listen to someone like me??? Who was I?

Then this morning when I checked my email, I had lots of notifications saying so and so left a comment on my SparkPage. WOW! Tons of people I didn't know were visiting MY SparkPage. Ok....but Why? I go look and to my surprise, I'm Motivator of the Day! I'm reading all these comments congratulating me, telling me I'm an inspiration, asking me how I did it, and so on.

So, for some strange reason, I started thinking about the girl in the grocery store. I was exactly like her in October 2008! (Ok so not exactly since I was twice her age but you get the general picture.) I was overweight and trying to learn about nutrition so I was reading labels. If I seen someone skinny (notice I said skinny, not fit and healthy, since skinny was all I wanted to be) looking at me while I was reading, I immediately put the box away and ran as fast as I could! I couldn't bear the thought of what they were thinking about me!

I would project what they were thinking about me such as, "Look at the fat chick who is going to try and lose weight again probably for the 100th time....Bet she fails again!" And I picture them laughing at me. I would think that because that is EXACTLY what had happened to me time and time again in the past. Diet...fail, diet....fail, diet...fail and on it went for years and years.

But then something wonderful happened to me! I found SparkPeople! I learned about food tracking and nutrition. I joined teams and made some wonderful friends. I read many, many articles and learned lots. And when I was having a bad day, or I went on a binge, or I felt like giving up, I would come to my Spark friends and tell them what was going on, tell them how I gorged myself and then cried myself to sleep because I was on the road to failing again.

But guess what?.....Instead of hearing what I expected, "give up, quit, why bother" I was given encouragement and LOTS of it! I would then go in search of other SparkPages and read wonderful stories of inspiration. And I would get motivated again and move forward. Many times I was on the 2 steps forward, 1 step back routine....but I kept putting one foot in front of the other.

What I got was encouragement....from EVERYONE! Not one single person told me to quit. NOT ONE!! I got so much encouragement that I COULDN'T quit!! I DIDN'T WANT to quit!! They weren't giving up on me so why would I consider giving up on myself!


I WANT TO GIVE BACK TO OTHERS WHAT WAS GIVEN TO ME!!

I WANT TO BE AN INSPIRATION!!

I WANT OTHERS TO ASK ME HOW I DID IT!

I WANT TO TELL THEM MY STORY!!

So from this day on, if I see anyone in the grocery store needing help, if I see women at the gym ready to give it up, if I see that runner on the side of the road panting, I AM going to give encouragement!! I will tell them about my own blood, sweat, and tears!

And I will cheer them on just like ALL OF YOU have done for me!

It's MY TURN to give back!!



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