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Taking Care of Yourself When You Become the Caregiver

Finding Health and Balance When Caring for Others


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  • All good points but they are easier said than done. For two years I was the main caregiver for my dad. Other siblings would complain about a messy house but do nothing to help. Or, if my dad would ask something if them, they'd respond that I could do it. Once when I was sick and couldn't drive him to visit my mom, I got a call saying I should drive home and wait in the car. When I said I had the flu, it was suggested I wear a face mask. So, like I said, easier said than done when others don't want to help.

    It was hard but I know I did what was right because I was not about to abandon a 91 year old blind man who wondered why his other children didn't visit much. Their loss.
  • taking care of anyone is hard mental work..

    take care of your needs as well
  • As a care giver for my elderly parents, this list is easier said than done. Too often other family members don't help. It was the hardest two years of my life. My parents are now both in a nursing mom with severe dementia and my dad simply because he is blind and unable to walk.
  • The article sounds great. Good luck doing it.
    I am a caregiver for my parents. Daddy died 3 yrs ago after living with us for 2. Mom lives on her own. I have a great husband picking up the financial end so I can take care of her. During Dad illness I worked 60 plus hrs a week. It was brutal.
  • This really didn't touch on those are a care-giver and very little services are available. my mother was dying of cancer. She was put on Hospice, but could only have a home health nurse would visit, bathe, take her vitals. I was alone with her the rest of the time. I was also 200 miles away from family and friends. The only thing I had was the telephone. This lasted for 2 months.

    Care giving is not easy. I even had to do the dirty work that no one likes to do.
  • I've been a paid caregiver for 25 years and for my folks now for over 3 years of whom I won't be paid for. I love them dearly and they can get on my last nerve, simply cause they are my parents. Where I live is next door to my parents. My husband and I talk to our neighbors and know of some of our problems and we know of some of theirs. Basically we help each other. Luckily I found that one is a retired nurse about my age and we go to the same church. If I have to go up North she has been able to keep tabs on them. I love the way of the Indian where it takes a village to care and help with the up bringing of a child. Like wise they repect the elders. Trusting in others is not always easy for everybody to do, but it does work for us.
  • As caregiver to my mother and my son who has Autism, it's easier said than done.
  • I am not a caregiver but I do know that you have to take time for yourself. If not you will wear your on body down. Good article.
  • This article has some excellent points, I recently became my mother's caregiver. The hardest thing really is keeping up on an exercise program; I can't leave her to take a run or even go into the basement to work out (she is on hospice care). I've been doing yoga a couple times a day, but I think I'm going to have to start strongly requesting regular help from my cousins and her siblings. I do appreciate the reminder that I need to take care of me too.
  • I am taking care of my husband & I have no time for myself.
    Great article.
  • Thank you for this excellent article and reminder for us caregivers (or, in my case, former caregivers)...and, anyone who is a caregiver would be welcome to join us on the caregiver support team!!!
  • I took care of my parents for about 8 years between the two of them. It was hard and sometimes I resented the time I lost attending to my own life for taking care of them. I lost my job during that time. My children finished growing up with a part, part-time mom (I worked full time too.) My marriage suffered.

    But, we made it and I now have no regrets for the time I spent with them--it was the last years I would ever be with them again. Although it was difficult, we made it through intact and I have a wonderful family with responsible adult children, and my marriage survived despite the difficulties.

    I utilized home health, family, church family, friends and neighbors to help in their care. It still took it's toll, but with a proper balance of help, support, and realistic choices -- it can be done.

    Good article!
  • This article strikes such a chord! Thanks for the reminder to look after myself first.
    I need this article now more than ever. My mom has been diagnosed with dementia, specifically Alzheimer's. She's in the early stages and we're trying to get the long term outlook taken care of. I'm thankful for my family and support, but since I live with my mom and it's just the two of us, it isn't easy.
  • I saved my dad twice from respiratory failure I'm his medical proxy, my brothers made things more difficult and my dad is very stubborn. The stress put on me was tremendous after him screaming at me in front of a visiting nurse and making a fool out of me for the last time after me trying to get in help for him ( I have fibro and it was taking it's toll on my own health) I had to just walk away. I love my dad but he's very difficult and was literally making me sick.
    I realized that I can't feel guilty I went above and beyond what any of my siblings would of ever done with no appreciation.
    The nurses and doctors told me that I shouldn't put up with his demanding ways in my condition when he didn't even appreciate it and that I should walk away before I ended up in the ground before him.
    It's a very dysfunctional family, now that he's all better for now he doesn't even know me that's the thanks I got for all my sacrifices....

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