SparkPeople Funnies

Dinosaurs didn't smoke cigarettes, drink alcohol, or eat junk food… and where are they now!?

‹ Featured Cartoon

Click the image to view, print, share and comment on today's cartoon!

See the Cartoon

More Health and Weight Loss Cartoons

We don't have a diet menu, but for $3.99 you can lick the stains off a tablecloth. You know you're a SparkPeople member when you try to pay in SparkPoints at the supermarket. How come nobody else thinks I'm as wonderful as my dog does? Our bodies store fat so we can survive during times when the supermarket is closed. You know you're a SparkPeople member when you can have an entire conversation about emoticons.
I printed your diet with a large font to make the portions look bigger. I recommend yo-yo dieting. Lower a yo-yo into your food, eat whatever sticks to the yo-yo. Something to make the world look sane again-- is there an app for that? I'm making my will. I'm leaving my money to charity, my organs to science, and my cellulite to the donut shop. Be careful-- sometimes it's a green lollipop and sometimes it's a brussels sprout!
Tomatoes, corn syrup, vinegar, water, salt. See, there are no cats in catsup! Our diet spaghetti is exactly the same as our regular spaghetti, except you plant, cultivate, harvest and grind your own wheat.

More Cartoons: (364 total)
[21]