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SparkPeople Funnies

For years your teachers kept telling you to settle down and sit still. You can stop now.

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More Health and Weight Loss Cartoons

My doctor told me to eat 5 fruits and vegetables every day. Today I had 3 raisins and 2 peas. Our diet lasagna is a hologram My blood pressure is 180/90 which mathematically is equal to 2/1 which doesn't seem so high! You need to incorporate some stretching into your fitness routine, so I glued all of your snacks to the ceiling!
I found 1837 web sites about 'alternative medicine' but none of them recommend pizza or chocolate for lowering our cholesterol. Looks aren't everything. It's what's inside you that really matters. A biology teacher told me that. I'm taking better care of my heart. I've started using aspirin as one of my pizza toppings. The healthiest part of a donut is the hole. Unfortunately, you have to eat through the rest of the donut to get there!
I tried all the fitness fads, but my doctor was right all along-- walking is still the best exercise. I eat right, I exercise, I don't drink or smoke… but I'm still going to die someday? That changes everything! Give me the chair and half of your sandwich or no unconditional love for you! If you put a crouton on your sundae instead of a cherry, it counts as a salad.

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